No big neither profound words today. This is an ego-entry, pure egotistic emo, I warn you. And perhaps I am writing from one sudden moment of despair. I have realised several times I am a person that is overdoing situations. Hei, afterall I have studied drama, right? But seriously. I can react very emotionally on some small things as well as I can torture myself for a long, too long time, thinking stuff over and over again. How I fucked up and all that. I am a highly educated person with several awards (oh my, what the fuck), I know there is no point in constant self-torture. What has happened, has already happened. Oh, and this highly educated self-confident person just totally sucks in communication. Despite she has studied drama (dialogs). And despite she is able to write such magic dialogs that can really amaze public (at least so she was told).
Some things just do not pass away that bloody easily, no matter how much I try. Convert, change, move further. Stay cool, stay cold, stay calm. Do your work. Live your life. Walk the path. Feel zen. A flower falls, even though we love it. A weed grows even though we do not love it.
In this case, time is everything that moves. Nothing else, just the time moves. Without proper, decent, not that bitter solution. I try so very hard, but nope, no go, still no go. No matter how much I try to be aware of the danger I might be overdoing situation again. Overdo in the sense that I see things much worse than they actually are. Yep, I really seem to be a master of various scripts; well, they are all doomy-gloomy bleak. Though sometimes things really hurt, and that's it. Things just hurt. No overdoing, real pain. Reality that sucks. Deal with this pain yourself... okay, yes, but how?! I cannot no longer. Such samurai I am. Yet I guess those samurais were also not very skilled when there was some simmilar emo-shit going on...
Huh, shall I now drink all that Kossu vodka - SALMARI I still happen to have in my cupboard...?