THE ALTERNATIVE SPEECHTIONARY

The radio where I occasionally work in Arts and Culture Department has come up with a project on European languages. It seems I will be involved into the project as well; but more on it when there will be actually done something. However, today, a jingle for the project has had to be recorded; kind of advertisement which will try to attract the listener's attention. This is an alternative radio station, so things are always done in a special and by all means recognizable way. Same goes for today's jingle.

Quite some of us radio-collaborators were called, and we all had one thing in common: at least some basic knowledge of one particular European language. More rare as well as more common languages we represented. And we were there only to... curse.

It was very interesting to hear this cursing set of languages, from Serbian, Bulgarian and Hungarian, to Italian and Spanish. Oh, again I found out how Finnish and Hungarian are so very different, despite sharing Fenno-Ugric roots. Anyway, when I uttered my Finnish line, the Spanish representative (non-native speaker) burst out laughing, and asking what the Hell that had been. ''It is beautiful. It sounds like there would not be cursing at all.''

Well, it was also very interesting for me to hear the record of myself while speaking Finnish. Huh, perhaps I should fetch my dictaphone and start practicing this recording? Oh my... and oh my again. I just hope there are not many Finns listening to this radio. When I returned from Helsinki in September, my spoken Finnish was much better, I think. More softer, more proper. Now I mainly read and write. Okay, and I do listen to quite some Finnish-singing bands. Sometimes, I also meet Finnish native speakers that live here in Ljubljana, I do talk, but still... as the overall environment would be the one giving that more proper sound. Ljubljana's Finnish is different that the one I was speaking or trying to speak in Helsinki and elsewhere in Finland.

Here is my cursing contribution. I won't explain the whole jingle-story behind it, since I was only the actor. But I am happy my very basic Finnish skills are slowely getting useful; at least somehow and in some way. Just do not be offended on behalf of the words below... this task was all about languages - and having some fun.

Voi vittu, sä oot yks mulkku jätkä, ihan typerä äpärä, mene ja opiskele suomea, perkele!

Fuck this (oh cunt), you're one fuckin' scumbag, totally stupid bastard, go and study Finnish, devil!